往事只能回味

Finally finish my examination, back to full time blogging haha! Erm...I feel that i didn't do well for this semester maybe because I got too many external projects and projects to an extent that I have lose my focus to my studies. However, I think it shouldn't be that bad after all because the subjects I take for this semester is quite Math-based but one thing for sure, I can't Aces for econometrics and game theory. Anyway, what's more important here is exam is OVER! hehe! It is time to loosen up a bit!

Recently, I go and dig into the drawers for some old CDs. I found a "Andy Lau 99' concert" VCD. I can't remember why I bought Andy Lau VCD during Pre-U/Pre-NS day. I just remember that is one cantonese track in the CD that I used to like a lot and i mean really A LOT. The ironic part is that I don't know cantonese haha! I remember I actually practised how to sing the song. I read the lyric again and do some self-reflection about my teenage days. Although the tune of the song is quite cheerful, the message it is conveying is quite sad. The lyrics goes by saying about a relationship between an ex-couple. The guy didn't cherish the relationship and in the end, the girl left him. The guy didn't know the importance of her till the day he found out that she had alreay married to someone else.

Erm...I realise that there is some similarities between the story and my teenage days. (Maybe that explains why I like the song then haha!) When I was in relationship, I took thing for granted and don't really care much about the other party's feeling till the day I initiated a break-up. I still remember I went out and "chong" as if there was nothing happen. About 5-6 months later, I got to know from our close friends that she was attached. I remember that moment my heart unknowingly become very "painful" but I didn't show it up. That failed relationship has become a thorn in my heart and the thorn actually accompanied me during my NS.

However as time goes, I started to ask myself "Why must I alway so unhappy?" By then, I can't find an answer so I kept myself busy doing a lot of things trying to explore as many things as possible. Luckily, I did find a few answers for this question. Although I am not sure whether it is a definate answer, I feel that the best conclusion I drawn for the question is that I have 'self-induced' the unhappiness in my life. Do you think that a person who kept on thinking of his or her unhappy memories is a happy person? I think the answer is pretty obvious. Life is just a process! What's happened had already happened! Why bother?! Just look toward your future! Now, I have changed the attitude toward life and work hard for my future. Although I have learned during the forecasting module that no one can predict what's going to happen in the future, I believe that I can shape he future that I want it to be if i am willing to sacrifice.

I have decided to share my teenage experience because I feel that it is part and parcel of life. For those who shared similar experience as mine, I hope you have already recovered. For those who have not, try to find some goals in life and you will realise that there are so many things that you have not accomplised in life. As time goes, you learn how to let go. Nevertheless, I have included a podcast of this song from baidu. I hope that you guys will like it!Below is the lyrics you can refer to (to the benefits for those who don't understand cantonese)

何时远何时近
有几多几多可是缘份
轻轻一吻就可得一个人
祈待我女人
仍然远仍然近
似馆中古董失掉年份
回望那过去叙述仍然最真
一次错的吻
当天的我不想结婚
只相告你已是我的情人
永远你在似是陪衬
似是传真挑选转身
真的苦恼自寻
今天偷看他的女人
方知道你已是嫁给别人
暗里我在眼泪微渗
眼泪强忍声音有点震
(music)
仍然远然近
似馆中古董失掉年份
回望那过去叙述仍然最真
一次错的吻
当天的想结婚
只相告你已是我的情人
永远你在似是陪衬
似是传真挑选转身
真的苦恼自寻
今天偷看他的女人
方知道你已是嫁给别人
暗里我在眼泪微渗
眼泪强忍声音有点震
永远不去问
从今天以往只会记挂
记挂在我心
明越痛去爱对爱越真
深深印
你已是寄居我心
woo
当天的想结婚
只相告你已是我的情人
永远你在似是陪衬
似是传真挑选转身
真的苦恼自寻
今天偷看他的女人
方知道你已是嫁给别人
暗里我在眼泪微渗
眼泪强忍声音有点震